CHAPTER 23
ANNA’S POV
“Anna? Anna! Listen to me!”
+26 BONUS
I ignored him completely, not slowing down for even a second as I rushed inside the house, my mind a mess of hurt and confusion, but a little bit relieved that Dad had gone off to deal with whatever business had brought him to Nivelle and that from there, he’d head to the airport to pick Mom up before meeting us at the restaurant. He had handed me his card earlier, telling me to shop for the dinner, to dress well, to represent the family–blah, blah, blah–but none of that mattered now. What mattered was that I hadn’t expected Ryan to actually follow me home.
I walked straight to my room and pushed the door, wanting to shut it and just be alone, but his foot wedged into the
gop before it could close. He forced it open and stepped inside, slightly breathless.
“Anna…” he called softly, his chest rising and falling
n my waist
“Ryan, please… I want to be alone,” I told him without looking at him, but then his hands were on my pulling me back toward him. His eyes locked on mine, intense and searching.
“I don’t want any of this either, Anna,” he said, his voice low but rough, almost desperate. “I’ll try to stop it. During this dinner, I’ll make it stop.”
The words hit me as if they were a wave, and my throat tightened. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, feeling the tears start to fall before I could even try to hold them back.
“Because I didn’t think it would be necessary,” he said quickly. “She’s… she’s nothing to me. I swear it.”
“But she called you babe,” I shot back, my voice breaking. “Which means you guys had something!”
“No! We didn’t have anything, Anna.”
“Then why did she call you babe?” My voice was sharper now, the anger mixing with the hurt.
He loosened his hold on me, his voice lower when he finally spoke: “Because… she’s my betrothed. She thinks we’re in a relationship, but I’ve told her countless times I’m not interested. I’ll make it clear to them today. I promise.”
I tried to move past him, to just end this before it destroyed me any more than it already had, but his hand shot out and stopped me, holding me in place.
“Anna… baby…”
I closed my eyes, hating the way that word still made something ache deep inside me. “But do you think it will be possible?” I asked him quietly. “From the look of things, that’s Dad’s friend. If you cut the relationship, that means you’re risking their friendship. Dad’s happy about this whole betrothed thing, Ryon. They even flew in from Europe for it.”
“I don’t care, Anna. I fucking don’t care,” he said, his voice hard and certain. “I want to be with you. Only you.
And God, I wanted to believe him. But my chest felt heavy, and I could already feel the sharp edge of reality pressing in. “Ryan… don’t do what you’re planning to do. Whatever this is what we have–it doesn’t even have a nome. It’s not like we’re in a real relationship. And it’s definitely not going to lead anywhere. One of these days, we’ll have to separate and face reality. It’s better this way.” I tried to sound brave, but my voice wavered anyway.
1/2
+25 BONUS
His eyes darkened, his grip on me tightening. “What we have, Anna, isn’t nameless. I believe we are in a relationship.”
I let out a bitter little laugh, though it hurt even as it came out. “This is reality, Ryan. Wake up. You have a betrothed. Whatever we have con’t be a relationship. And… as much as it hurts, I guess I’m glad I found out now, before I let myself fall even deeper. At least this way, it’ll be easier to detach.”
He groaned, his voice almost pained. “Anna, what we have is real. You’re mine. You were made for me. I won’t leave you for anyone else.”
And then I saw it again. His eyes… golden yellow, glowing, inhuman. His grip on me was almost too much, his fingers digging into my waist, and I swear I could feel his nails lengthening, his teeth sharpening into fangs.
My heart pounded. “What… what…”
He blinked hard and shook his head as if shaking off some wild thought, his features shifting back to normal. He groaned quietly.
“What was that?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Nothing,” he said quickly, too quickly.
I stared at him, really stared, searching his face for an answer I knew he wouldn’t give me. Then I lifted my hands to his cheeks, holding him there so he had no choice but to meet my eyes.
“Fuck me,” I said, my voice trembling but somehow coming out firm, as if I’d already made up my mind.
to mine, his brows furrowing. “What?”
Ryan’s eyes s
“I said fuck me, Ryan.”
His jow tightened, his breathing sharp. “Anna…” he groaned, almost like he didn’t know whether to pull me into him or push me away.
“Please…” I whispered, my throat tightening as I forced the words out. “This is going to be our last time having sex. Because after this dinner, this… whatever we have… it has to stop. Guilt won’t let me go any further. So now… I just want to live in oblivion for a little while. Please… take me now.”
I went on my toes and crashed my lips into his, shutting out everything else–the dinner, Sophie, my own heartbreak–just needing to feel him one more time before I had to let go. He kissed me back instantly, groaning against my mouth, his hands gripping my waist so tightly it almost hurt, as if he was terrified I’d slip away if he loosened his hold for even a second. But then, just as quickly, he broke the kiss, his forehead resting against mine.
his breath rough and uneven
His eyes searched mine, burning with something between hurt and fury. “Do you even hear yourself right now?” he said, his voice low but sharp, each word hitting like a slap. “Last time? You think I’m going to let you decide that this is over just because you’ve convinced yourself it’s the noble thing to do?”
“Ryan-”
“No.” His voice deepened, that commanding edge rolling through it, making my chest tighten. “You can call this our last time fucking if that’s what you want to tell yourself, but understand something, Anna–this is definitely not the last time I’ll make love to you.”
And before I could even find a response, his mouth was on mine again, hard and demanding, kissing me as if he was staking his claim all over again, as if he was making sure I knew he wasn’t letting me go no matter what I
said.